


Pet Project

by TenSpencerRiedPlease



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Bucky is trying his best, Humor, M/M, Protective Tony Stark, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Trans Peter Parker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-10
Updated: 2019-02-10
Packaged: 2019-10-25 10:17:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17723300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TenSpencerRiedPlease/pseuds/TenSpencerRiedPlease
Summary: Peter and Flash have been yelling for an hour, which Tony wouldn’t normally accept in any capacity but... fuck, even the way the kids these daysargueis weird. “Buck, you don’t get it. They’re yelling about Ned but its not really about jealousy,” he says. Or any other red flags, he’s been listening in.“Ned is social suicide, Peter!” Flash yells.“Ned is the best friend anyone could ever ask for!” Peter yells back.





	Pet Project

**Author's Note:**

> I've decided Peter/ Flash is the cutest shit I've ever seen and I HAD to write it. So here it is!
> 
> Also, Peter being trans isn't _super_ relevant to this thing but Tony does make a casual reference that does need the understanding that he's trans- which, warning for a pregnancy (no one is _actually_ pregnant) mention.

Peter and Flash have been yelling for an hour, which Tony wouldn’t normally accept in any capacity but... fuck, even the way the kids these days _argue_  is weird. “Buck, you don’t get it. They’re yelling about Ned but its not really about jealousy,” he says. Or any other red flags, he’s been listening in.

“Ned is social suicide, Peter!” Flash yells.

“Ned is the best friend anyone could ever ask for!” Peter yells back. He’s not wrong there, Ned is excellent and also a good influence. Unlike Flash, who started out as Peter’s high school _bully_  and then somewhere that wasn’t a thing and now they’re _dating_  and he _knows_  Flash drinks at those ridiculous parties he throws even if he claims not to. He’s a bad influence. Peter should stick with Ned. He should date _Ned_. Or even Liz, she was a nice girl. Yeah her father was a fucking weirdo but she and her mother were nice.

“Are you seriously listening in on their argument?” Bucky asks him.

“I have friends that are as good as Ned that _won’t_  kill our social life!” Flash counters. Oh, little _prick_! Ned is a nice boy, he doesn’t deserve this slander!

“Of course I am, you know how I feel about Flash,” he hisses at Bucky.

“Yeah, I know you have it out for the kid because you’re basically worried he’s you but smaller but he seems fine. Pulled his head out of his ass, is a Mathlete and honestly _that_  should have been social suicide but I guess its Ned, and he’s got good grades and stuff too. By all means he treats Peter fine,” Bucky says.

“No one else would have taken a bullet for us like Ned did!” Peter says and Tony frowns. Taken a bullet? He means that metaphorically on account of if Ned had been shot with an actual bullet he’d know about it. But what’s he _talking_  about specifically?

“Kid is skeezy and I know it!” Tony hisses. He’s got a feeling.

“Oh my god Tony, Flash is _fine_. You need to let go of this vendetta against him he’s an actual _child_ , it’s weird,” Bucky tells him.

He’s being fucking _rude_  and Tony is having none of it. He might have hung up on him too, for dramatics, if the argument didn’t take on a flavor of interesting he never wanted to taste.

“Oh my god Peter, it was _one_  time!” Flash says and what was one time? He _knows_  that means something and its not going to be good.

“Flash, he walked in on us in the library and shoved us out of sight when a teacher almost walked in pretty much right after and told the teacher he was _watching porn_  to save our asses! Name _one_  friend that would do that for you! You can’t because all your friends are shallow dicks!” Peter yells.

Tony’s eyebrows hit his hairline. “Ned walked in on you doing _what_?” he yells and Bucky sighs on the other end of the phone.

“Teens have sex Tony, get over it,” he says. Tony knows that. Its an inevitable thing, he’s had The Talk with Peter he knows what to expect.

But the Flash part of this equation has _got_  to go.

Peter sticks his head out of his bedroom door, “you told me to do stuff you wouldn’t do and you’ve never had sex in a library I’d know about it because Buzzfeed would have wrote an article about it so really this is  _your_ fault,” he says, shutting the door in Tony’s face.

“I’m going to kill my son,” he whispers. “Scratch that, Peter is fine. I’m going to kill _Flash_.”

“Oh Christ Tony, you’re only looking for a reason to hate the kid. If it was Ned in Flash’s place you wouldn’t care,” Bucky reasons.

“Not true, that was more information than I ever needed on my kid’s sex life that I didn’t know existed until two seconds ago and I wouldn’t have wanted it if it were Ned either. But Flash is _clearly_  a bad influence,” he says. “Peter, open your damn door!” he yells.

There’s a slight pause and on the other end of the line Bucky lets out a long sigh. Peter reluctantly opens the door looking like a kicked dog and Flash has the good sense to look terrified. “ _You_ ,” Tony says to Peter, “are grounded. And _you_ ,” he says to Flash, “ _get out_.”

Flash nods, accepting his defeat while Peter sucks in a breath, prepared to fight about it but gets distracted by Flash heading to the _window_  of all places. “Use the door, kid. How the hell are you supposed to leave out a window in a penthouse suite?” Tony asks, confused.

Flash gives the window a panicked look. “I uh. Was just gunna die,” he says and he’s totally covering something up. Peter looks like he’s swallowed the frog Flash spread the rumor about living in his mouth so there’s absolutely something to this. And he _will_  find out what.

“He’s going out the door come on Flash lets go,” Peter says, flying across the room at top speeds. He grabs Flash and whips out of the room fast, Flash in tow.

“FRIDAY. Tell me how Flash is getting into Peter’s room,” Tony tells the AI.

“Can’t you let the kid live?” Bucky asks.

“If Peter gets pregnant I am _not_  prepared to deal with it,” he says.

Go figure he’d get a boy with the ability to get preggers. Damn child.

*

“That’s not fair!” Peter whines and Tony gives him a _look_.

“Come on, eight thirty isn’t even long enough to watch the movie,” Bucky reasons with him and Tony gives him a _look_. Did he not read that parenting book? You’re not supposed to undermine the other parent in front of the kids he _knows_  this. And Peter is only _barely_  ungrounded- this is like... residual grounding.

“Eight thirty is fine,” Flash says with too bright of a smile.

“If it was Ned you wouldn’t even give me a time to be back at,” Peter points out.

“That’s not true and I gave you a time so deal with it,” Tony tells him.

“You’re being unreasonable,” Bucky tells him.

“I am not! You’re too lenient,” he says. “May would agree with me,” he adds.

“She would _not_!” Peter says, on a whining kick today Tony guesses. He didn’t do that before Flash started rearing his ugly head. He’s turned Tony’s lovely, usually even tempered child into a whiny insufferable brat. Okay, he’s only the whiny part of that description but _still_. Its Flash’s fault.

“Ten is fine, not that late and it actually gives them time to watch the movie,” Bucky reasons.

“Sounds great, thanks Bucky bye!” Peter yells, dragging Flash out by the arm. He’s slammed the door before Tony can tell him that _no_ , that is _not_  what he damn well said. He turns and glares at Bucky.

“What? He was the one who ran off, I just listed a time,” he says.

“Did you read that parenting book I gave you?” he asks, squinting.

*

“You realize we just got the _best_  solution to our problems, right?” Flash asks as they flee the scene of his overprotective father’s house.

Peter frowns, “did we?” he asks. “Because ten’s not that late,” he points out.

Flash rolls his eyes, “you dumb beautiful bastard, not that. You said if it was Ned you wouldn’t have a curfew. So just _say_  you’re hanging out with Ned and come over to my place, problem solved!” Flash says, grinning.

Peter’s eyes grow wide, “and Ned would totally cover for us because he’s the _best_  and _not_  social suicide,” he says.

Flash shakes his head, “no he’s still social suicide but now he’s my pet project on how not to be a social reject because he just got useful to me,” Flash says.

“Don’t be rude, he’s a good person,” Peter tells him.

Flash curls an arm around his waist, “yeah, I’ll be polite,” he says in too casual a tone.

“ _Flash_ ,” Peter says, giving him a _look_.

“What? I’ll treat him like a business partner. Don’t look at me like that, that’s pretty good treatment and gets him access to parties and my math homework. That’s better than most of my friends get,” he says.

Peter shakes his head, “I have no idea what that means but I’ll take it.” In the meantime there’s always Bucky to get better curfew times from.

**Author's Note:**

> [My writing Tumblr](https://tenspencerriedplease.tumblr.com/)


End file.
